http://www.blurty.com/users/freshey/

This was where my thoughts resided first.. Can't transfer it over so I linked to it here

Feeling like i'm out of control, here i press on.
Visions of better days, dreams of the future.
Can't I make up for the past by freezing the present?
Would it make a difference..
Why couldn't this have gotten done sooner?
I sit here, where i put myself once again.
So much going well, yet so much seems like it's hopeless.
If i can only keep my mind in it when it counts
this could be avoided.
Life trudges on, I can only meet each new day as it comes.
It's tough to think how the rest of my it hangs,
on the decisions I make now.
It's downright scary.
All the sleep I've used to escape, leaves me here unable to.
Chemicals fighting chemicals, caffiene my companion.
I know I'll be someone, something, somewhere, sometime.
Slowly I realize the opportunities wide open for me.
Help me to bring these dreams and ideas in my head to reality.
Not be frozen in focusing on the end, but striving to complete the journey
taking steps, not trying to hop over them.
I go forward...
I will make a difference, leave my mark.
How thankful I am for those that care, for those who love me.
My sacrificial love to those for whom I care.

Date:	2004-03-20 04:40
Subject:	Chi Phi Crush
Security:	Public
Mood:	chipper

You ever have one of those events that you just never wanna forget? Well this is one of many of those. Tonight was an amazing night! :-) It was our Chi Phi Crush Party and it turned out so well. Of course my date was Cynthia, I mean who else man? heh. Her, along with all the other girls were picked up by limo on campus where they were taken to the destination, StarShip Dining Cruises in ChannelSide. We on the other hand were there waiting for their arrival.
It was nuts man I almost rear ended Errol on 275 because traffic slowed down so fast. Similar to the first fender bender i had with my mom's car.. eek. Anyways that was avoided after some craftey manuvers and some skidding.
Back to the crush party, I was getting kinda anxious, wondering if the limo driver was gonna find the port. He was 30 minutes late in picking up the girls cause he couldn't find his was around campus, had to be directed by phone. It was his first time, guess we could give him a break. He got there just in time around 7:15. Cynthia was soooo awesomely beautiful :-0. She was wearing a long black dress, with her hair all nice and free flowing *sigh* *eee*. The night was on.
We boarded the ship, after getting our picture snapped (*watch the hand*). It wasn't anything huge, but it was comfortably sized with three levels of dining and a dance floor at the top. We proceeded to the dining room where we had a special section reserved for us. Each seat had a small paper menu welcoming the Chi Phi Fraternity (that's us ;-) and informing of the evenings food order. What's most awesome is the keepsake champagne glasses bearing our Shield, and saying Chi Phi Crush Party '04 around it.
Dinner went really well and was mad yumness. I kept thinking how I loved sharing this experience with Cynthia. We were right next the window, and the view was neat and ever changing as the boat moved out of port. Made the rounds to the tables meeting some of the guys dates, talkin etc.etc.
After dinner it was up to the third level for some dancin! Whoo Hoo that was cool. Cynthia and I Hammed it up and had loads of fun twirlin each other around and shakin our booties. We got to dance one slow song which was so sweet (Lonestar - Amazed). I wish they would have done more. And boy was Nate was killin it out there, Whew! The best part ever though (Ho JEez mayn here it comes!) was the house band let pete and craig get up there on the stage to play a song to their girls. The song of choice? Duncan Shiek - Barely Breathing.. Pete sang, Craig played the guitar.. the drummer?.. ME!! Man that was so cool to get to play like that. we all didn't sound that bad. To bad we had just put Cynthia's camara downstairs :-/.
Seemed like not to much time passes before we were pulling back into port. We ran back to get the camera and got a picture of Cynthia and I up on the top deck, that should be sweet. Then it was time to go. Hung out with Cynthia a bit afterwards before she had to get going back home herself *AIR GUITAR!!* *ROOOAAARR* *wee* I love her soooo much!
Met back up with some of the guys and gals at Denny's, then to Nate's where I played with him and his friend Chris for a bit before getting the security guy shutting us down. What's wrong with playing at 3AM??!? ha ha.. Now i'm back.. showered.. bed.. Just awesome..

Date:	2004-03-11 14:49
Subject:	What a match :-)
Security:	Public
Mood:	cheerful
Music:	Jars of Clay - I want to fall in love with you

♥Clinton and ♥Cynthia

Will never have a handful of evil kids. Love to almost elope in private. Follow their dreams.

Orchestrated by ianiceboy

Date:	2004-02-18 08:49
Subject:	Early Mornings
Security:	Public
Mood:	okay
Music:	Rebecca Lynn Howard & Jim Brickman - The Simple Things

Woke up early this morning around 8:15, gotta work on some English. I'm really suprised that i'm making a solid effort in this class. It feels pretty good. I have math at 11 so that give me 2 solid hours. If i could only get myself away from these websites *shakes fist* he he. Eh..
I called Cynthia this morning right before her first class. She was totally thinking of me hardcore, as I often do of her ;-). That was pretty cool. She's got an exam today in Developmental Psych. Give her some support if you run into her :-D. She's still the most awesomest person I could ever ask for.

Date:	2004-02-17 23:37
Subject:	Some Test Results
Security:	Public
Mood:	contemplative

Got bored working here in the computer lab. Found this website that offered an online IQ test. Drumroll please....

----- Oooo check me out ;-) ----------
http://web.tickle.com/tests/uiq/

Congratulations, Clinton!
Your IQ score is 135

We also compared your answers with others who have taken the test, and according to the sorts of questions you got correct, we can tell your Intellectual Type is Visual Mathematician.

This means you are gifted at spotting patterns — both in pictures and in numbers. These talents combined with your overall high intelligence make you good at understanding the big picture, which is why people trust your instincts and turn to you for direction — especially in the workplace. And that's just some of what we know about you from your test results

-----What kind of kisser am I?-------- *They nailed this..
http://web.tickle.com/tests/kiss/

Clinton, you're a Romantic Kisser..

Whew, is it warm in here or is that just you? When it comes to kissing, you get your drive from the lure of romance. For you, it's more than a meeting of the lips. You appreciate kissing for the rush and for what it symbolizes. Long-stemmed roses, candlelight dinners, and weekend retreats to bed and breakfasts. Sound about your speed?

You're a kissing partner who can go beyond the sweet surrender of locking lips to discuss the meaning of relationships. To really express yourself, you're probably one who's concerned with setting the proper mood. You might light a fire or take your date to a beautiful lookout before cuddling and kissing. You probably like to make a lot of eye contact, gently hug and touch your date, and talk tenderly about your feelings.

While your intensions are pure, your intensity might sometimes be a little overwhelming. Don't forget that being playful can also be a sign of affection, and remember, sometimes a kiss is just a kiss.
-------------------------

With this site you have to setup a profile type thing in order to get your results. It's not too bad, if you wanna do it. Lemme know some results.

  Today was some pretty good stuff... Started with a crazy physics lab that i still have work to finish in, seeing Cynthia in there for a bit :-D. Then physics class where I fell asleep once again, woke up, thought about leaving.. didn't.. learned about somthing i actually knew about then found someones cell phone. She ended up being right outside the class when it was over.. calling it from a friend's cell. I know how bad it would suck to lose even my cell phone, so i'm always happy when i can lend a hand.
  So then i messed around for an hour before I had to goto work, where I actually got to work on the machines, replacing some floppy drives. I don't really understand why something like that makes me happy but it does. I guess it's cause I love doing things with my hands, the whole kinetic thing. Then I wrote an email to you know who and attacked some more of the physics lab work. Hooray for paid study time!! I love this job.
  Welp Tis time to call this one.. 'night all! I'm off to sleep with my newly scented Spiderman Pillow.. Oh yeah.. you want one.. :-P

"I'm finding myself at a loss for words, and the funny thing is, it's ok"

My legs are tired and aching from the truckpull we worked tonight. Definately an experience, we sold programs and these GraveDigger monster truck lights to the crowd. I've never held that much cash on me in my life, it was nuts. At the end, It was pretty cool to finally get to see part of a monster truck show live. Now I Just got showered, and I'm doing some codelab assignments before I get to bed. Hopefully I'll be able to find somthing to wear tommarrow cause I need to laundry again. Goodnight..

Date:	2004-01-14 23:50
Subject:	How i Feel
Security:	Public
Mood:	chipper

*Begin transmission*
*eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeEEEEEEeeeeeEEEeeeeeEEEeeeEEeeE!*
*End transmission

For those who are wondering, I'm working for A/V services here at the University. My main job is to answer the trouble-line that they have for people to call when something has gone wack or they just don't know what to do. Thing is, I've only answered about 3 real phone calls over my 14 hour career so far. I guess in this "training time" I'm getting to acutally go out with the repair guys and check stuff out. Which is acutally what I like to do better then sitting around waiting for a phone to ring :-P. Oh well we'll see how this goes. I acutally just got an email the other day from Chris officially offering my a position with resident computing services as a lab assistant. Am I going to take it?.. YES! In fact it'll most likely end up replacing the A/V job. I've been wanting to do that since I came here to school. I'll have to give a good enough warning before I do that though.
Anyways I just woke up early here to get some work done and I'm feeling quite productive. Laters..

   Nothing to special today, the usual classes. Hanging out with cynthia was an exception though, and i'm not just saying that, it's always special :-).
   Work today though was immensly borning although i did get some action towards the beggining. I went out with A/J to fix some wireless mic problems in two rooms, got to see the back room with the mixer and amplifier and stuff in one of them so that was cool. After that it was sit on butt time, seriously like i feel asleep for a bit there, at work, it was nuts. I always feel like i should be doing something but would really rather not, and didn't have to, which makes for a weird internal conflict. I stayed a little later past 8 and acutually got some Math homework done which i feel really good about. I'm gonna do the same tommarrow and see if i can get into a pattern which would = nice and good. Add in the getting paid (eventually) factor and you've got some nice study time.
   Then it was off to Hooter's to scarf on some greasy wings (heh heh) with the Chi Phi Crew after the Rush info night. We had three prospects come out which was tight, (Bryan, Frank, and Sharog) hopefully we'll see more of them and new guys and i'll get to tell them a bit of my story, get them to really check us out and see what we have to offer.
   After that it was a quick trip to Nate's place to check out the result of a water main leak right under the dining room. It was nuts to everything all moved and the carpet ripped up all around, especially with a jackhammered hole right before the kitchen! I was over there with Errol, Josh, and Pat. Me and Josh ripped on the drums a little bit before Errol showing us some Aikedo moves from this new class he's taking then we headed out.
   Now i'm ready to get down for bed cause it's getting late and i'm letting time fly by me. I love you Cynthia!! Goodnight all!

Wow tonight was so awesome! I got to hang out with my baby at her place. They got a trampoline for christmas and so that was the first thing we did. The fact that it was freezing outside and that the trampoline was wet made it quite interesting. WET BUTT!! lol anyways, that was some fun stuff. It can exhaust you pretty quick, but it was nice to lay out on it and look up at the overcast sky (heh heh). Cynthia was saying how it would be perfect for a sleepover type thing, and I would say that I'd have to agree. I was definately comfortable laying there on the trampoline with her. To laugh, play, bounce, and wrestle (PIN!!)... good times. Afterward, we hit up a rousing game of phase 10 with her brother joe as well. I needed a little bit of refreshing on how to play but I got right into the swing of it. I pulled ahead quite a bit and thought i had it in the bag when fate turned the other way and Cynthia ended up smoking us. Throughout the game, two cups of hot chocolate, a cup of raspberry green tea, hershey's dark chocolate, and some take home sonny's BBQ were enjoyed... sooooo yum. I also tryed some of Cynthia's favorite Rose tea which was quite delectable I must say :-). After the game was over it was time to head out but not before having a decent conversation with Ralph about the sound at church (which he is in charge of). So after the goodbyes and trip home, here I am. Did I mention it's ultra cold outside?...yeah.. it is.

So now i'm downloading some musac. Checking some more of Skillet (A Rockin Christian band which Cynthia introduced me to), Seventh Day Slumber (a band I just heard on the radio), Hooverphonic, and Sneaker Pimps. The last two of which I heard with my friend Johnny. I'm also taking a little journey back through my massive mp3 music collection, which I often do. I REALLY love music. I wish I could much more of how I feel in that one little statement so that it projects to anyone who reads it, and they just feel it too. Music measures timeframes, gets associated with so much, can express exactly how you feel (even without words), affects your mood, it's just nuts!

Gotta run now though, gotta get up for church in the morning then get started on some homework for monday. Toodles!! lol

Just got back from Nate's place where i finally got some laundry done! It was cool cause we watched "Freddy Got Fingered" and had some pizza. I wasted a ton of time though sleeping until 1-o-clock... jeez. So now i'm waiting for the shower to be free, fretting over the work I have to do, yet getting excited about hanging out with Cynthia AT her place! She's working until 5 or earlier if she gets let out and we'll go from there. *bouncy bouncy* on the trampoline! Heh sweetness..

Date:	2004-01-09 10:08
Subject:
Security:	Public
Mood:	chipper

Heh I saw this on Errol's Journal and just had to! It's acutally true.

Your Love Situation by Amberishjewel
Username?
Your Love Is...	Gentle
During Lovemaking You Act...	Like a volcano, hot & steamy
Your Partner Is...	Your everything
Your Partner Has Said That You...	Are extrodinary
Your Love is Summed Up In A Quote.	"Play is not for kids alone"
Created with quill18's MemeGen!

Here's off to the last day of the first week of classes. I only have my math class today, and i'm really glad i finally got my math book for a good deal. $50 is much better then $150! Then I go right to work, where i'll most likely go over and do some of my math homework. Yay! for now i gotta get ready. Pimpy Out..

Date:	2004-01-09 00:48
Subject:	So Sweetness
Security:	Public
Mood:	loved

Well I'm almost to the end of the first week and things are going pretty well. My classes seem well laid out and I definately am resolving to not screw this up again. I also finally figured out my book plan and am going to have all of them tommarrow when I get my english book. Although I had to postdate a couple of checks to save money in the long run. I just hope all of that works out.
I've started my new job with A/V Services which I think i could call classroom support. I'm pretty much gonna be taking trouble calls from teachers who can't figure out how to work stuff or have technical issues. I like to go out in "the field" though so hopefully i'll still have a little bit of that. I also talked to Chris Martinez, head (from what i gather) of Resident Computing Services, regarding a lab assistant position. I would have never expected this many opportunities. The jobs are mostly chill jobs too and have time where I could study and everything! To top it off they're on campus!
Today was nuts in that it started with me rushing out the door at 9 AM in exactly what i was wearing yesterday, which i happened to wear to bed. All this in order to get to my 9-o- clock lab at 9:15. It was quick cause I just got the syllable (whatever) signed a paper and left. So i figured i'd catch Cynthia before her 9:30 class. *eee* I like surprising her, and I get all warm and giddy inside when I see her, *sigh* so in love. *Snaps outta it* What? Oh ok..so then I was heading back to my dorm to finally get all showered up and changed for the day (ha ha), when i happened upon the poster people who are doing that sale in the SVC breezeway. They were unloading for the day and so i helped them out, later in the day putting some flyers around for them too. I got Spiderman poster outta the deal so that was sweetness!. After finally getting ready I was off to try to get Cynthia her watch back which was broke but i fixed :-) with loving care, but she had gotten out early and was off to work which was made on time *yaay*. Next it was an hour wait in line for refunding my books to the USF bookstore. Leading to Physics class with the teacher who speaks low and in a semi thick "quick-e-mart" accent.. snore.. off to work after that till 7:00. Alot really happened between all that and after, somehow i feel the need to go on but realize that I'm tired and am rambling.
Last note is that I just watched Final Destination with Roberto and I believe his cousin. MAN that is a MESSED up Movie *shudder*. Just whoa..
Off to the next new day...

Date:	2003-12-25 04:34
Subject:	Merry Christmas!!! with updates!!
Security:	Public
Mood:	mellow

Merry Christmas Everyone!! It's Christmas Eve, (well now it's christmas day) and due to the fact of me taking a nap earlier in the evening, i am now awake here at 4 in the morning.

Seems like i've finally decided to blow off the dust and shoot an entry in here. Hasn't been all that long but very much has happened since last recorded in my blurty. Currently i've been staying at my friend nate's place over the break. And unfortunately I wasn't able to get home for any length of time. I did get to Grandma's place though for thanksgiving (where i got to see the whole family) and also to pick up some stuff for Christmas.

Cynthia and I are still going strong and we've done so much together. I'll just have to start from here with our experiences because they're just to numerous to list :-). I'm falling even more in love with her each day, she's so awesomeness. I think i'm still in that "man this can't be real" type phase or i'm just not quite realizing something. I'll save ranting about her for another entry ;-). This next week in the Poconos is gonna be a long one without her and she's gonna be missed, but i'm still gonna have a blast, hanging out with friends i've been neglecting.

Grades have come back in and I got A+ in programming (as if there was any doubt), an A in Sociocultural aspects of aging (Hooray for getting that paper done!!), but an Incomplete in the intro to art class cause i didn't do any of the projects and the teacher doesn't fail people and is cool like that. So I'm definately gonna take this second chance to make it right with that. English i dropped mid-semester so that's a W. However, I'm all up in it for the spring where it's not gonna pass by me again. I'm gonna have a hefty load though with physics, math, english, and a programming class on my plate. Yum yum eat um up.

Most pressing business now is the trip tommarrow BABY!!. I got everything I need, (well except for a pair of gloves and some decent shoes) to GO! lol. I'll probaly pick up those things later on today or something, then get ready to head down to Melissa's to stay the night and leave early in the morning. I'm pretty psyched about this, it's been in the works for a while now. It'll also be cool to spend some time with the gang cause i've been missing chilling with them lately.

This here livejournal is gonna be the main thing i update in from now on.. somehow i may find a way to transfer my old entries from my blurty all up into here. That's the only thing i was considering in the first place with the switch. Until next time folks..

Was hanging out with Tara tonight, ended up hanging with some other cool peeps and now i'm feeling pretty good right about now. Gotta get to sleep cause i have programming class at 11. Tara gave me a code to sign up for a livejournal here which i wanted to get in the first place but went with blurty.com cause it didn't require that crap. My user name on www.blurty.com is freshey also so one can go and check out the previous entries there if so desired. Most likely gonna get the semagic client for this beeotch and start updating this one more often, we'll see. Meanwhile i go forth in search of rest. |-\